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Letting Go

Letting Go

Turns out, having a breech baby is a very hot topic. I’ve been met with the most mournful reactions from some crowds, “Have you checked out Spinning Babies?  Natural is the only way to go,” some high fives, “Aren’t you relieved, you can just have the c-section now,” some guilt inducing commentary, “It’s your fear of childbirth that is keeping the baby from turning,” and so on.

It really is amazing. Pregnancy is such an interesting time when people really do feel it is their absolute right to share and guide you on the most intimate, emotional and physical “journey” (yes, I did just use that word—tipping my hat to the fact that I have been indulging in low brow TV, “The Bachelorette”) of your life. On the one hand, it has been a lovely way to connect with people you normally wouldn’t but the unsolicited commentary on how to give birth has left me frankly annoyed.

I will say this—I tried acupuncture and the burning of the moxa sticks around my toes. I went to Dr. Berlin, the famous baby flipping chiropractor. I have turned myself upside down. I’ve been going to yoga consistently. I’ve chatted with my baby, prayed and meditated about him turning, if that is what is best for him and me and will result in the healthiest and happiest birth for us both. And my guy has not turned. He is “frank breech”—kind of in a pike position and will most likely not be turning due to how long he has happily been in this spot—head right under my ribs, ouch!  And due to an anteriorly positioned placenta,  it makes it hard for him to turn.

So, I am choosing to focus on the positives of having a cesarean!

1. I get to meet him sooner—doctors want you to have a c-section the week before your due date so your chances of going into labor and having an emergency c-section are diminished.

2. I get to keep my nethers in tact!

3. I will avoid the horrors of pushing and laboring for 20 hours and then have to have a c-section—blown out both ways?! No thanks.

And I know this is bordering on preachy, but I feel like any position on any subject that is too rigid, is just that—rigid. The “natural” birth camp that make women feel guilty for having a cesarean when it is the safest thing for the baby... that is a judgement and it’s unsupportive, so zip it. Same if a woman chooses to have an epidural. None of your business. Zip it. And I understand some women who have this image of birth and they want to “have that experience.” For me, conception and pregnancy has been the ultimate gift and a lesson in giving up control because you realize this is bigger than you, your plans, what you envisioned and you can’t control it! I imagine actual birth and child rearing will be an even bigger opportunity in terms of letting go…

So ladies, my thoughts are that you will have your own perfect, unique and special birth—it may not look anything like what you’ve imagined—but it will be yours and your baby’s. It will be perfect no matter how it happens! So congratulations, let go, enjoy and get ready…we’re about to go on the biggest adventure of our lives—parenthood!

Categories: Labor

Mary Firestone

Mary is a new mother still figuring out how to balance motherhood with life. Several years ago, Mary, and her sister Lucy, founded Firestone Sisters, Inc, a blog and website dedicated to empowering women through encouraging travel and exploration. What started as just a blog has morphed into the Wild Precious Life retreat series where all that they write about is brought to life.
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