Big Little Lies Recap—Episode 3

Morgan Armstad Milennial Mom

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We're OBSESSED with Big Little Lies. Loved the book, and so far, loving HBO's adaptaion of it. So we're going to be digging into it each and every week! Join us as we dish on everyone's favorite new guilty pleasure.​

The third episode of Big Little Lies delves a little further into the lives and backgrounds of the show’s four main mommy characters – Jane, Madeline, Celeste and Renata. We get more glimpses into the past of Jane, the mysterious new mom in town. Meanwhile, it becomes increasingly more clear that the “perfection” that Madeline, Celeste and Renata exude is all a facade.

Madeline gets a little taste of empty nest syndrome, when her oldest daughter tells her she feels too pressured to be perfect by her mom and decides to move in with her dad instead. Celeste and her husband start seeing a new therapist, in an attempt to save their marriage from more physical abuse. And Renata unsuccessfully tries to pull every string in her arsenal, which are plentiful, to guarantee her daughter has the ultimate birthday party guestlist.

As different as the four moms and their current problems are from each other, there is also a striking similarity between them – their need for a strong fellow mommy support system.

After a fight with her son over his family tree project, Jane opens up to Madeline about her past and her son’s father. Afterwards, she admits that Madeline is the only person she’s ever told the story to. To me, it makes a world of sense that the first person Jane feels comfortable enough to open up to about the story is a fellow mom.

Because having the support and backup of even one fellow mommy friend, is everything when it comes to surviving parenthood.

I know firsthand the truth of that. If I hadn’t had a fellow mom to back me up when I was alone, scared and pregnant, I honestly don’t think I would have made it through with my sanity still intact. My best friend Abby has been monumental in my journey to becoming a mom. She understands the irrational fears, she knows about the lack of sleep and out-of-wack hormones. She just gets it, mostly because she’s been there too.

As a young or single mom, having any kind of support system makes everything more bearable. When part of that support system includes another young or single mom, it makes motherhood seem just a little less terrifying.

I am so lucky that I found the leader of my mommy backup team, and even more lucky that she and I lived in the same apartment complex for my first two years as a single mom. She was there for me every single day. If I was sick, she’d take Skye for a few hours so I could get some rest. When the day’s stresses were becoming too much and I was at the end of my rope, she always knew just how to bring me back to clarity and stability.  

When motherhood starts to beat you down, which it inevitably will, nothing can compare to having a fellow mommy to be your vent. Someone who just gets it. And it’s not just single moms who benefit from having a mommy friend as backup. I think every mom needs someone like that in their corner, ready to wipe the blood and sweat off their face and get them back into the ring for the next round.

About the Author

Morgan Armstad

Morgan Armstad is a part-time writer and waitress, as well as a full-time mom to her incredible daughter Skye. She loves to read, dance and eat Milano cookies. She graduated spring 2016 from the University of Montana in Missoula with a degree in journalism with a history minor. Morgan is currently working and writing at Mamalode magazine in Missoula and has written for the website VProud.

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