Dear Daddy I [Have Been] Called A Whore

Meg Dowaliby Girls

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This morning I woke up and stumbled across a commercial that nearly moved me to tears, titled: “Dear Daddy, I Will Be Called a Whore.”

Watch it here:

It was shared by a man on Facebook who said “I might be wrong and I may even miss part of this point but I think this is one of the dumbest commercials that theoretically has gone viral that I can remember in the near past.”

To the man on Facebook, let me tell you why you are wrong, what you missed, and why it’s not “one of the dumbest commercials that theoretically has gone viral that [you] can remember in the near past”.

At various points throughout my life, I too have been called a “whore” and a “bitch” by guys.  But “it’s just for fun” right?  I should just brush it off—I deserved it—right?

Like this commercial points out, “behind every joke there is always some truth.” But what I wish I’d have known growing up is that the truth was not that I was a “whore,” but that anyone who said it was revealing a truth not only about himself, but about the world that I, as a young woman, would grow up in.

The story in this commercial is very real and all too common.

I watch my younger sisters in high school as they put up with boys who are constantly name calling and taunting and teasing, and it only seems to be getting worse.

Why are we not giving these attitudes more attention?  After all, the attitudes developed in our younger years shape us into the people we will become.

Maybe if we gave these attitudes more attention at younger ages, we wouldn’t have to worry what names our daughters and our sisters will be called.  Maybe if we gave these hurtful tags more attention, we wouldn’t have to worry about the safety of our daughters and sisters in the hands of men.  Maybe if we gave these damaging mantras more attention, we wouldn’t feel the need to make commercials such as this.

I wish I could tell my sisters that it will get better; that they won’t have to go to college prepared with the thick skin they grew in high school, because they won’t have to live in fear of the names that boys will call them—sometimes “joking,” sometimes not.

I want my sisters to know that “joke” or not, it is not okay. We were raised to be strong independent women and we should never forget that this does not make us a “whore” or a “bitch”; that these “names” can never replace “scholar,” “leader,” or “friend.”

So, to the man on Facebook, you are wrong.  You are wrong because the story that this commercial portrays depicts very real realities of my own life and the lives of many others, including my three sisters.

You missed that it’s because of ignorance like yours that these attitudes and “jokes” continue to be given no attention—that they get treated as if they have no consequences, that they don’t cause irreparable harm. You, sir, were wrong.

This commercial shines light a topic the needs to be discussed.  This commercial most likely portrays the realities of many women around you, but your lack of acknowledgement that this is even an issue leaves you blind to that fact.

To the guys my age or younger, who have or have not been a conceiver or an accessory to these “jokes” and name calling, someday you may have a daughter, or four, just like my dad.  How do you want her to be treated?  What do you want her to be called?

“[She] will be born a girl, please do everything you can so that won’t stay the greatest danger of all.”

Most of all, remember that, “One thing always leads to another. So please stop it before it gets the chance to begin.  Don’t let [boys] call girls whores because they’re not; and one day some little boy might think it’s true.”

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About the Author

Meg Dowaliby

"Meg Dowaliby is the eldest of four girls. She grew up with her toes in the sand and the rain on her face on the very northwest tip of the Oregon Coast. She currently lives in Missoula, Montana where she is a senior at the University of Montana studying Marketing. Business and Sales Assistant at Mamalode, she is also a writer, a wanderer, a book-worm and a sunset chaser. She loves to learn, run, climb mountains and, above all, spend time with her family."

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