Find the Magic in Your Heart

Juli Fraga essays

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Last week, I was driving home from work and hit several patches of construction along the way. Traffic was down to one lane, drivers were honking at each other, and navigating my way home felt like driving through a maze or a labyrinth of sorts.

I finally made it home and my patience was wearing thin. I could feel my cortisol rising as it took me nearly an hour to drive just three miles. I had no more than set my purse down on the counter when my daughter, Lucy ran up to me and said, “Mommy, I have magic in my heart!”

“I have the magic of love and kindness in my heart,” she proclaimed. “Everyone has magic in their hearts, you find it as you get older,” she said.

I was shocked and stunned by her words.

“How did you figure this out, Lucy?” I asked her.

“Mommy, you don’t figure things out with your head, you feel them in your heart,” she tenderly replied.

I felt tears well in my eyes. She never ceases to be one of my wisest teachers. Her words reminded me of the importance of feeling our way through things.

Caught up in the stress of my day; heavily trafficked streets, rushing around to make sure I was on time, I had spent too much time in my head. I came home and I was distracted, because the busyness of the day had thrown me off course.

“What other kinds of magic do people have in their hearts?” I asked her.

“Oh, you know, the magic of courage,” she replied.

That night, she asked me how to write the words, “Find the magic in your heart,” and she wrote them down on Hello Kitty notebook paper. I happen to know that Hello Kitty turns 40 this year (and despite what has recently been said, I think she is indeed a cat). Another fact about Hello Kitty, she does not have a mouth, because she speaks from the heart. I didn’t realize how much my daughter and she have in common.

Since that day, we have used Lucy’s words as a mantra in our household to navigate big feelings and communicate with each other. Speaking from the heart trumps thinking our way through things. Who knew my daughter would be the one to re-teach me this wise lesson.



About the Author

Juli Fraga

I am a psychologist in San Francisco. I also write for the Golden Gate Mothers Group Magazine, The Huffington Post and Psychology Today.

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