Am I A Bad Mom?

Camile Lindsay Stay at Home Parent

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The alarm started blaring at exactly 5am. I jumped out of bed.

The still-black sky greeted me.

Only 45 minutes to get dressed and finish packing before my cab arrived…

At 5am I am usually wearily dragging around the house with sleep coating my lids. But, not today. I had boundless energy and a big smile on my face. Not only did the day mark the start of a much-needed break, I was headed on vacation without my husband and kids! Five whole days without being called “mommy.” Five whole days with no one asking why we needed to go to the mall. Again.

I sometimes envy moms who proudly proclaim phrases such as:

I love being around my kids 24-7.

I wouldn't dream of taking a vacation without my babies!

My husband and I don't do anything without each other.

And sometimes I can hardly suppress the urge to roll my eyes.

Although I LOVE my babies and husband and genuinely enjoy their company, I also LOVE having time to myself.

I braced myself for judgement when I told people that I was leaving the country to go on a girls' trip and that Kwabs would stay home with the boys. I knew some of them would inwardly shake their heads and assume that my maternal instincts were out of whack. They would question how I could leave my “poor” husband alone with a 4 year old and 10 month old. After jubilantly sharing my vacation plans, I always felt the need to reassure them that I laid out all of the boys' clothes, made sure the house was clean, had stocked the fridge with food, and arranged for pick-up and drop-off to the sitter and daycare.

Of course my guilt didn't keep me at home. I practically ran down the jet-way and glanced back twice…

to make sure Kwabs and the boys didn't trick me and follow me on the plane!

I enjoyed every minute of my trip…the lazy days by the pool, the massage, the meals that didn't require me to feed someone else before I ate, the long showers (without an audience), and the uninterrupted sleep in a bed all by myself! It was a dream.

I think all moms need a break sometimes. We need to relax and recuperate from all the work that goes into being wives, mommies, employees, etc. . . . We need to hang out with our girlfriends and laugh as we share details about our families, our futures, and our pasts. We are better moms after we make time for ourselves. I returned from my trip rested, re-energized and ready to give my all to my family. I also made it home in time for Halloween which was Max's only request in addition to bringing him Legos.


About the Author

Camile Lindsay

I am a wife, mommy to two boys, Max and Myles, , and an attorney in search of my life's passion.

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February 2016 – Food
Nourish yourself – mamanomnom
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